It's not as easy as it sounds. I have discovered that no matter what size you are, what cup you are, what city you live in, it's not easy to find that perfect bra. If you are flat or full figured, you are always in search of that perfect, sexy, but yet comfortable piece of cloth.
OK, now Victorias Secret is appealing for some and God knows I had my years of shopping there. As we (or I) age, I have gone from having Marilyn Monoe boobs to Aunt Bea Boobs...in other words, from a full cup to a lonnnnnnnnnng cup.
It was shocking to me when I took my Grandmother to help her find a braziere back in 1983. At the time I was pretty darn perky and "they" still saluted the sun! Grandma insisted I come in with her to the dressing room and help. It was hard for her, at 81, to get the bras on and off and go run and look for others. So in I pranced, ready to help. Now my Grandma weighed a good 90 or so lbs then and when she took off her bra, I am telling you, I just had to turn my eyes away and sit down. Sweat broke out on the back of my neck and the thought of aging was pouring over me. (This is wear the "long" comes in) I learned that in aging, we lose our fullness and it suddenly becomes loose skin. There I stood, as Grandma, "rolled 'em" and plopped 'em into her bra. (Beam me up Scotty!)
I was remembering that senario at a department store this weekend. It was time for my annual trek to get new underware. This department store is a very fine store and I looked until I found ones that seems right. A profoundly thin woman with pursed lips suddenly appeared, insisting on helping me. OK, I said! She pulled several, suggesting I try this brand and that brand. She then settled me into a dressing room. (Dear God, I hope there are no hidden cameras, no time for "punking") That's when I started to shvitz! Then, "what to my wondering ears appear, but a pursed lipped salesclerk ready to sneer!" She knocked on door, actually tapped 3 times and said, "May I come in? Dear? I yelled NO! and she said what? I thought, "You have time to save yourself, you'll go blind, get out now, while you have the time!" By the time, I opened the door, patting my brow, I told her they had not worked out and she said, well, let me fit you. I looked at her and said, "You just don't understand......they aren't what they used to be!" She said, well, you just need to be in the mood. I suppose, I muttered. <<<sigh>>> Then I thought, what if men had to go through this to buy jock staps? Oh heck, they'd love it! <<<sigh>>> I used to be Marilyn! Don't even get me started on thongs!
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30 comments:
Last time I went to buy one, a store employee came up behind me, wrapped me in a measuring tape and told me what size to wear. Her swelling should be down soon, and she may be able to walk again.
xoxo
Last time I had a salesperson "fit' me, she deduced I needed a 38D. Must have been the new math, cause when we finally finished that wasn't even close. I mean the girls sag, but not THAT much. yet.
Too funny! As one who has long felt the effects of gravity, I salute you.
I wish I had even one thing to contribute here --- but I'm lost, Anne. Good luck with the boob thing. :) Russ
I'd rather take a beating than shop for lingerie.
I wait 'til the elastic is gone out of both the straps and the back, before you'll find me shlepping thru the department store with 4 or 5 38- LOOOONNNGS, mumbling to myself, "God, just let me get to the dressing rooms before they see me. I promise I'll stop the obsession about trading torsos with Selma Hayak; and I'll quit spraying Redi Whip down my throat at 3 in the morning."
I'm just about to put my hand on the knob of the dressing room door and I hear a screeching sound. Is someone skinning a cat in Macy's!?!
There's a solid tap on my shoulder as I'm about to duck in and hide my shame in a new 38 llloooonnnnggg. "Do we need some help with a bra today?" Will someone put that cat out of it's memory. Another tap. I spin around to be confronted by a walking/talking white pipe cleaner. "Do we need help with a bra?" she repeats.
No! The white pipe cleaner certainly doesn't, but the marshmallow with arms and legs DOES!!!
I swallow, "Nooo?" I attempt, but it sounds more like I'm begging for mercy.
BUT NO MORE. Now I just order them and save my humiliation for the privacy of my own home!!!
AS YOU CAN SEE, I RELATE!!! LOL.
http://journals.aol.com/cyndygee/TheRealWorldofcyndygee
Cyndy
Sometimes I'm tempted to just stick to the sports bra I use when I ride the horse; keeps everything plastered against my chest with no bouncing. I agree, it's hard to get a bra that fits well as I age.
oh Anne, you crack me up!!!!!! judi
I loved this one! One of my Mom's favorite stories was when I told her that when I grew up I wanted looooooong boobs like hers. I hate deceptive advertising. One of my biggest disappointments was to discover that Miracle bras aren't.
Candace
Simply LOL. Great entry. Thongs...lol
I know what you mean!
I used to be a 36C...now I'm
a 48DDD Long! LMAO!!!!
Connie
pretty funny stuff! i do it the easy way, i just found one that was comfortable, then started ordering them three at a time from www.OneHanesPlace.com ... i'll bet it's been 20 years since i actually went to "try on" ... always did hate that!
There was a time when being in a tight space with the cute Victoria's Secret girl might pique my interest. Those days are over. LMAO
*why do they ALWAYS wanna SEE?
Love and more Love,
andi
As thr brother of four "older" sisters, I've had a few good laughs with them on this subject. You have my "support", 100%. rich
Yeah, I notice something different in my breast size and perkiness... I'm almost 30 (in 9 months!) and I have notice mine are getting a little pointing downward too... They used to be very perky and stood straight out (not down or anything)... I'm up to a size 36C now... I used to be a perky 38B and could wear a "teeny-tiny, bikini top"... Now it's like a fuller and bigger cup bikini top...
But I have read a lot of books on women's health and anatomy, that this is normal for your breasts to do this as you age... You'll have to wear a larger cup size, adjust a little bit more, and change the type of bra (probably have to start wearing some with underwire now)...
And it's hard to find the perfect bra for a sexy dress or shirt, I know... I have a hard time with that too... But the search goes on.... And always will every decade... So, all I have to say is LOVE YOUR GIRLS AS THEY ARE AND ACCEPT THEM... What else CAN you do??
Jody
I cannot compete with the comment below! :-O
My boobs aren't as perky as they used to be either. --Albert
Cyber hug back at ya!!! ((((( )))))
as a woman ages so does her body. its true for men too. my boobs are sagging and my privates too but hey its better than being 6 foot under. my wife is a 42 c
+ cup thats all i know. after she showers she makes remarks about how they droop. she was a 36b or c before we got married almost 28 years ago.breasts are really for babies and sometimes men. i have a relative who grandmother used to powder her breasts after a shower so she slung them over her shoulders and proceeded to apply powder because of heat rash.i have heard of putting a rubber band on the nipples and adding a little weight and letting the weight over your shoulders to bring the breasts up toward the sky but that might hurt. if you cant find a great fitting bra at belk or any other major stores try victorias secret. my daughter always found what she wanted but shes almost 23 so she doesnt have a problem yet.however mature women are mature and are very blest because at least you have them. i have friends that have none and a few that have one. anyway if you get frustrated just wrapped them like the japanese do. good luck in your search but those under wire types are great but after awhile they dont perform like they did when new as my wife has told me.
God help me, I hope I never have to do the roll and plop! LOL...
~JerseyGirl
http://journals.aol.com/cneinhorn/WonderGirl
you still lookin' for that bra?
"i have heard of putting a rubber band on the nipples and adding a little weight and letting the weight over your shoulders to bring the breasts up toward the sky but that might hurt."
holy cow!!!
Loved the rest of his comment...... he knows more than most men!!:):) judi
welcome to the club....right now I spend about 50.00 dollars on a bra I can only get in FL,NY, or GA. Never having the opportunity to enjoy perky breasts, I say this someone out there loves them. If you want support check Goddess bras. I loved your journal though, someone shares my same struggle.
i'm not even sure i'd mind how loooooonngg mine have gotten if only my nips were still in the center facing forward ( o Y o )
instead of burried at the bottom somewhere, facing my toes
( )( )
0 0
i feel your pain
Too Funny. I woke Ernie up by laughing so hard! I recall watching my grandmother dress and she would lean way over and shake her entire upper body trying to jiggle those "things" into the proper cups. Once latched she would reach in (and I swear, around) and "pull" it all together. When I asked her what she was doing she'd reply that she was "getting her C-cup together". My daughter used to pass her training bras off to me as she outgrew them (back afore I got fat). Thanks for the funny story. Paulette
Absolutely priceless writing. I feel your pain girl. I am a 44L(ong) myself!!!
I really want to thank you because all the work that you go through to look good for a man
try something from Moving Comfort: http://www.movingcomfort.com/
I dont think women should wear titholders it makes it harder for the guy to suck on em
the last time i even wore a 36 in a bra was when i was 16,and it wasnt a c cup,i believe it was a d.just be thankful you remember having small breast.ive been a dd for years.25 yrs +.anyway if you can afford it get a reduction,i did.now i can find a bra that fits.of course im almost to old to enjoy small breast.
{{{{{ Anne }}}}},
OMG how hilarious! As my mother used to say--- I'm not laughing AT you, I'm laughing WITH you! You are a hoot. But I can oh so relate....and when you have mammoth mammaries like I do, the force of gravity is very unforgiving as these 'girls' go southward! Thanks for making me truly 'laugh out loud'!!
Vivian
"A profoundly thin woman with pursed lips suddenly appeared, insisting on helping me."
I think that is a requirement for working in the lingerie section, isn't it? I recently went through this too, http://journals.aol.com/mombzbe/LivinlavidaMommy/entries/776
and I can relate. How dare they bring a measuring tape in there--I barely let medical personnel see me in that stage of undress, much less a stranger, lol.
Funny entry--
Anna
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